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Autumn

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Wednesday, October 4th 2006

07:48:40 AM

Artist of my soul

Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Never in a million years did I think I'd be where I am today.  Faced with some very difficult decisions, I press on toward that which is ultimately best for my children.  How does one determine what that is under such circumstances?

Is it best to allow pretense to exist?  Do we simply pretend that all is well, give the children some sense of security, all the while deceiving them and running the risk they'll learn the truth and resent us for it later.  This, of course, has brutal consequences for everyone...mom and dad grow farther apart and the children bear witness to bitterness.  Or do we abandon the pretense altogether and allow them to fully appreciate the magnitude of the situation?  No, of course not.

The other solution is to test the waters of separation.  Hoping to find some resolution to issues past, being apart would allow breathing room.  Time for introspection.  Discovery of what lies beneath.  And the children?  Well, any decision we make will not bring forth the peace and security we long for them...we simply make what seems to be the best choice, and purpose in our hearts to serve them and their needs, not us and our own. 

I do not know what the future will bring...who does?  I do know that God has got my back, that He loves me unconditionally, and that He will take care of my every need and give me strength to press on.  I have great peace with that knowledge.  I do at times tend to worry for my children, however, that's limiting God's love and provision in my life, isn't it?  I must move past the fear that, even though God has lifted my head through all of this, He won't give my children the same measure of grace.  What kind of faith is that?  It's weak...conditional...wavering.  No, I must trust that His compassion is all-encompassing...that it reaches far beyond what I know, and right down into the very core of my childrens' lives and grabs hold of them.  They will be cradled in His arms ever so much more than I can ever hope. 

And there is where I must start...put the paintbrush right back in God's hands and allow Him to bring life again to the work of art He created.

4 What You've Thought!.

Posted by Ruth:

Great pain can cloud our vision and lead us to desperate acts. As you suffer in the anguish of a pain that not many people can understand, I beg you to guard yourself from the devil's false promises of peace. God can bring beauty from ashes, even the ashes of the situation you presently face. Jesus preached against divorce (Matthew 19:8-9, Mark 10:5-9, Luke 16:18). In Malachi 2:16, God says, "I the Lord hate divorce." The book of Hosea studies how a faithful spouse can follow God's pattern of keeping coventant with one who is unfaithful, even to the point of reconciliation. God's plan and pattern is for people to keep the vows they make to Him, including their matrriage vows. Ecclesiastes 5:5 says that it is better not to make a vow to God than to make one and not fulfill it.

I know you are hurting deeply, and I am so sorry that you are. If you feel that you or your children are in an unsafe situation, you must throw yourself on God's mercy and ask Him to lead you out of danger. But if it is pain you are experiencing, please try to be brave and trust God if His plan is to bear you through the pain rather than to remove it from your life. 2 Timothy 3:12 says that everyone who wants to live a Godly life will be persecuted. God does miracles through pain and stretches us and grows us into beautiful Christlike saints. I wish this was not the way it works, but it is (see Romans 5:3-5, 1 Peter 1:6-7 and James 1:2-4). God works through pain in our lives.

Please, please please do not let the devil deceive you into following your feelings. I know it hurts so, so much. But Satan wants you to jump out of the frying pan and into the fire. He wants you to lose faith that God can heal your situation. He wants to dangle bait that looks like it would feel good and relieve your pain, only to add to your pain and destroy your witness later.

We must look to the truth of scripture and cling to it when we hurt. Our feelings can not safely guide us.

God does
Thursday, October 5th 2006 @ 04:26:37 PM

Posted by Ruth:

Great pain can cloud our vision and lead us to desperate acts. As you suffer in the anguish of a pain that not many people can understand, I beg you to guard yourself from the devil's false promises of peace. God can bring beauty from ashes, even the ashes of the situation you presently face. Jesus preached against divorce (Matthew 19:8-9, Mark 10:5-9, Luke 16:18). In Malachi 2:16, God says, "I the Lord hate divorce." The book of Hosea studies how a faithful spouse can follow God's pattern of keeping covenant with one who is unfaithful, even to the point of reconciliation. God's plan and pattern is for people to keep the vows they make to Him, including their marriage vows. Ecclesiastes 5:5 says that it is better not to make a vow to God than to make one and not fulfill it.

I know you are hurting deeply, and I am so sorry that you are. If you feel that you or your children are in an unsafe situation, you must throw yourself on God's mercy and ask Him to lead you out of danger. But if it is pain you are experiencing, please try to be brave and trust God if His plan is to bear you through the pain rather than to remove it from your life. 2 Timothy 3:12 says that everyone who wants to live a Godly life will be persecuted. God does miracles through pain and stretches us and grows us into beautiful Christlike saints. I wish this were not the way it works, but it is (see Romans 5:3-5, 1 Peter 1:6-7 and James 1:2-4). God works through pain in our lives.

Please, please, please do not let the devil deceive you into following your feelings. I know it hurts so, so much. But Satan wants you to jump out of the frying pan and into the fire. He wants you to lose faith that God can heal your situation. He wants to dangle bait that looks like it would feel good and relieve your pain, only to add to your pain and destroy your witness later.

We must look to the truth of scripture and cling to it when we hurt. Our feelings can not safely guide us.
Thursday, October 5th 2006 @ 04:29:52 PM

Posted by Anonymous:

God does not promise a pain free life, but He does promise to walk beside us through the pain and give us strength for the day. Habakkuk 3:19 says, "The sovereign Lord is my strength, He makes my feet like the feet of a deer, He enables me to go on the heights."

The Bible tells us, in Colossians 3:13 to forgive as the Lord has forgiven us. The way the Lord forgave us was by bearing the pain of our sins in His body on the cross. We are called to no less. He does not call us to suffer more than He has suffered on our behalf.

God can bring you through this and restore what has been lost. Carefully consider God's Word and your witness, the tender faith that is growing in your children, the people you have been trying to witness to in your families. Make your decision very, very carefully. I am praying for you and your family
Thursday, October 5th 2006 @ 04:32:32 PM

Posted by Ruth:

That anonymous section awas the continuation of my previous comment. I'm sorry the first part got posted twice. I pray that I do not offend you. I love you, Maria. I want you to experience God's best. I don't always have the most tactful writing style, so I pray for God's mercy in your interpretation of what I have said.
Thursday, October 5th 2006 @ 04:35:46 PM